People Don’t Have to Change

thanks to everyone for their good luck messages for yesterday’s tournament. Somehow, we managed to win GOLD!!! It’s my first gold medal, so I was – and still am – so pleased and proud both of myself, but mainly of the whole team!
Anyway, enough about me…

People don’t have to change for them to change in your opinion.
We all have people who, for one reason or another, we don’t like – we’re humans, what can you expect? There’s always that one person who, when their name is mentioned, you roll your eyes, sigh, or instinctively frown at the idea of. I have plenty of those people myself – people who I dislike because they’ve done something to me, my friends… You get the idea.

At the tournament yesterday, I was on a team with one of these people. Honestly, I don’t think they’d really done anything that was particularly bad; I think their reputation spoke before they did, which is sad. It makes me feel stupid, really, for allowing a person’s reputation to influence my judgement on them; I’ve always thought that I was better than that, but clearly not. Regardless, I didn’t like this person particularly; they seemed alright to talk to, but that was pretty much it.

Now, let me assure you, when you spend a day with someone, you get to know them reasonably well. When you spend a day with someone during which you have to work really solidly as a team, you get to know them a little better. If you already know this person from training sessions, you end the day knowing them pretty well.
I went in yesterday with the mindset that I didn’t like this person, and I wouldn’t like this person any more at the end of the day. I wasn’t dreading working with them for a day, as I would with some people; it was just more I didn’t want to work with them, if you get what I mean.

Throughout the day yesterday, however, my opinion changed. How things change when you stop listening to other people’s thoughts of someone, and actually get to know them yourself, in person. this person, it turned out, was actually really nice: they were helpful, funny, kind, friendly – everything I thought they weren’t. For example, getting around an unfamiliar sports centre when you’re totally blind can be a bit of an issue, and they recognised that. They have a little more vision than I do, and along with one other person, we worked together and made sure that we all got around just fine.

I’m sure you have someone who you don’t like, like I did – and still do, just not this one person. Have a think: why do you dislike them? What have they actually done? There’ll likely be one person who, actually, hasn’t done anything, really, and you dislike them based only on others’ opinions. If you can, try to talk to the, or get to know them. It’s hard, I know, because everyone judges you for talking to them, but trust me:
People are going to talk, so let them talk.

L XX

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17 thoughts on “People Don’t Have to Change

  1. Congrats on getting gold, L! And you’re right, perspective can change itself when you give it a chance. Great post as always 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Aw, I’m so happy you were able to change your view on them! It’s really sad when before you’ve even met someone, people talk about their reputation in a negative way, and that affects your own personal thoughts toward them. When I work as a leader at a kids camp, it’s so important for me not to hear someone’s negative reputation of that kid and inturn take that on-board myself. I need to have a clear and positive mind always. Just like you did πŸ™‚ xx

    Congrats on the gold btw! That’s so AWESOME πŸ˜€

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Woo congrats L! FREAKING GOLD MAN! πŸ˜€ And I have a friend who judges people really quickly and has a one-minded opinion – she dislikes people who’ve done nothing and are the sweetest and nicest. I’m not really sure why.
    And I used to be like this a lot but I’ve grown to be more open about people.
    Wonderful post πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Freaking gold indeed! 😜
      I used to be like that too, and from time to time I still am, and hate myself for it. I think I’ve realised this more now, after being the subject of so many vicious rumours, and seeing what they can do to you.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Exactly – occasionally I will silently judge someone on what I hear but I really try stop doing that. And I’m sorry about your rumours, but at least you can build up on what you’ve learnt.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. It’s all about giving people a chance, and getting to know them first before we ourselves pass judgement πŸ™‚ I always like to give anyone a chance, because people may say things about them which may not be true, or is true but that person is trying to move away from what they have done. You never know the circumstances really. Oh and congrats on the gold!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. OH WOW GOLD, CONGRATULATIONSSS
    I completely agree with what you’ve said here. And you know, maybe we’re all just hypocrites. We don’t want to be judged yet, we judge others. Honestly, we need to look beyond the idea of what we think people are and ACTUALLY get to understand them. Loved your post as alwaysss

    Like

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