Society today dictates a lot of expectations and rules relating to gender, and sometimes even age. Women and girls wear make-up, high heels and worry about their hair, whilst men and boys wear jeans and trainers, and will never be caught in any shoes that are not flat: that’s just ‘the way’, and we don’t argue with that.
Unless you’re like me…
In some ways, society contradicts itself.
Women and girls wear make-up, and boys don’t… But it’s OK if boys do!
Boys and men wear jeans and t-shirts… But it’s OK if girls do!
What a load of crap. All that this tells me is that we, as a society, are firmly stuck in a timewarp. We’re trapped in an age where everyone’s accepted, but everyone’s judged, unless they are the walking, talking representation of social standards.
Why can’t I, as a boy, wear make-up and high heels without immediately being labelled a tomgirl, or transgender? No word of a lie, I quite like the idea of wearing make-up and high heels, of worrying about my appearance, of wanting to create the perfect selfie. So why is it, as a male of the species, I’m not allowed to do that? Why does one thing – my sex -, which is decided without any consultation on my part, define so many dos and don’ts in my life? If I walked out of my house today, wearing 3 inch heels, lipstick and holding a selfie-stick, there is no-one alive today who could say with 100% certainty that I wouldn’t be judged by the people around me, for the simple reason that I would, whether it be aloud or silently. [Unfortuantely] I go to an all-boys school, and there are actually school rules in place, banning the use of make-up on any boy in school uniform, on or off of the school site.
I understand that some girls and women will feel similarly: they want to wear ‘boys clothes’, and do ‘boy things’, but by doing so, they’re instantly labelled a tomboy. This is ridiculously old-fashioned, in my opinion: the world has supposedly moed on, and yet the very people who tell us that are so stuck in their inappropriate traditions, they are telling us nothing but lies. the ones who are teaching us that the world has moved on, ahat we live in a better place than our parents did at our age are the people who are holding us back, who are doing the damage.
Even blogging, as an example, is a part of this. Several times, I’ve told someone that I blog [obviously not giving them the link]. At least three people’s reactions have been a moment’s silence before: “Isn’t that a girl thing?”
Let me get this straight: ire there people out there telling me that because, quite frankly, I have a higher amount of testosterone, I can’t decide to write a blog online?
simply, are there people out there who think that writing – plain and simple writing – is a ‘girl thing’?
Yes. Yes, there are.
Continuing with the blog analogy, what difference does it make? To you, dear reader, what diference does it make if I’m male or female? Am I less valid as a male blogger, or is that just another of society’s lies?
I realise that I’m coming across as quite angry and frustrated in this post, and that is because I am both angry and very frustrated. This whole thing is unfiar, unjust and wrong. Why on Earth can’t people understand that? Sure, maybe I’ve absolutely lost my mind, and maybe you strongly disagree with me. that’s fair enough, but why does that mean that you hae to stop me from living my lie the way I want to live it? If you saw a teenage boy in the stret wearing make-up, you would likely stare, and if not at least take a few moments to think about the ‘strange’ sight before you. But, consider this: is he hurting you as an individual or as a member of society?
No, of course not.
So what’s the issue?
My final gripe here is related to music. Many – oh, so many people have commented on my music taste. Common adjectival phrases include ‘girly’, ‘feminine’, and ‘abnormal’. some readers will know of my rather strong hatred of the word ‘normal’, and that hatred is also directed at the word ‘abnormal’.
In regards to the prior two descriptions, I ask this: what is the issue? Oh yeah, I forgot, liking Taylor swift, Ariana Grande and music from the High school Musical soundtrack is illegal. Sorry, my mistake…
I really can’t see the issue here at all. I don’t understand why artists are suddenly gender specific, and liking the wrong one immediately makes you the subject of whispered discussion – sorry, ‘banter’ -, and the object at which people unashamedly point and stare.
Is there logic here? If you ask me, no, there isn’t, and yet these well-out-of-date stereotypes continue to live on un esisted and unchallenged. Well, here I am, publically challenging them. I feel they’re old fashioned, unnecessary and unworthy of a place in modern-day society. Society should have moved on by now, but it hasn’t, and this is why.
i’d love to hear your thoughts on this post. It’s taknn me several hours to first translate my thoughts into words, place those words into sentences, use those sentences to build paragraphs, and then to edit, arrange and create this post. It’s taken quite a lot of condidence to even post this; I am fairly positive that i’m going to receive some hate and negativity in response to this post, and that alone caused me to question whether I should be publishing this at all. However, this is my blig, and I, unsurprisingly, am me. Personally, I fee nothing wrong with writing how I feel, so long as iI’m clear in stating that I do not expect the rest of the world’s population to agree with me. I will also note for the record that I wrote, edited and proofread this post listening to all three of the artists [well, High school Musical isn’t really an artist but hey…] listed above in this post. I’ve got to admit, Dangerous Woman has really grown on me throughout the duration of this post’s creation!
As I stated above, I’m fully aware that some people will completely disagree with my views, and so long as you’re willing to discuss the topic civily, I have no issue with you leaving your own thoughts below. Regardless, I hope that you’ve enjoyed this post, and that’it’s both made you think and taught you a thing or tow, whether it be about society or me as an individual.
Lots of Love