I should really mention in my tag line or something that I have a cat, because she’s featured a lot on this blog. Now, she’s annoyed me, and so I’ve written to tell you why.
I’m ill today, and having a day in bed. WHY does my cat not understand this, and therefore spread herself out on MY bed? Specifically, spread herself out in front of my pillow, so I can’t lie down. Moving the pillow results in her lazily standing up, stretching and plodding over to the pillow’s new location. From here, she proceeds to hit my head surprisingly ferociously for a cat with her paw, until I lift my head to scream at her. She then sits down where my head was, the smug twit.
Or now, for example, my cat has left my bed for me [at last], and decided to start talking to the bedroom door. It doesn’t speak, cat, and it definitely doesn’t speak cat language. Give it up, because you’re going to be hit in a minute by a pillow from my bed…
Oh yeah, and she decided to sit on my laptop [which is open and on], so my word document had a load of random characters at the end. Trust me, my cat is the devil, I swear. Why does she do this to me today, when I’m genuinely not very well, home alone and growing more and more frustrated?
Do you think this is her way of revelling? Am I unwell, headache full [new term], and dealing with the cat uprising? Yay – it must be my lucky day, right?
I’ve managed to grab a bit of sleep, and am going to try for some more soon. I’m currently coming up with blog post ideas, to keep myself busy and distracted from the antics of “The Thing”, who has just moved into the next room. I think she’s running around or something, because it goes silent for about 10 seconds, and then there’s a lot of movement for about 30 seconds, and then silence, and so on. Would it be cruel to go and shut her in there? Actually, she’d probably start trying to knock [or yowl] down the door; bad plan L.
Brilliant, now the other two cats – the placid ones – have just started “Playing” by running up and down the stairs. This house has problems, and I’m alone in it. Someone, feel free to come save me…