How are you? I hope you’re well. I’m OK, although I need to get some sleep; I had all of about an hour last night, and I’m feeling the consequences of that now…
I want to tahnk
for bringing this to my attention; it came up in a conversation we were having, and now I’m going to write about it.
None of us like to arguments. Sure, you’ll get a parent who claims that you’re just “looking for an argument”, but absolutely nobody actually enjoys arguing; it’s just not in our nature. Yet, we immediately, and usually unintentionally, jump to arguing as our number 1 solution when we have an unresolved problem with a friend, family member or, if you’re like me, the cat.
Once we start arguing, I think you’ll agree that it’s hard to stop, because with every response, whether verbal or written, you feel more and more obliged to take up an offensive stance. Then comes the shouting, again either verbal or written, which is basically each person desperate to have their point of view heard, understood and accepted.
We shout because we’re angry.
We shout because we’re misunderstood.
We shout because we’re upset.
And it boils down to just that: we shout. And in the end, there’s no reason for us to be shouting, but it’s gone on for too long, and shouting just seems like the right thing to do, despite the fact that both people are hurting, and in reality, both parties now have just one objective, and that objective is a common one: to stop arguing.
think about it, next time you find yourself in an argument. However tempted you are to immediately respond with your point of view, stop. Check yourself over, and just remember this: The results of arguing are always worse than the results of a calm, civil discussion, where both parties acknowledge each other’s oppinions, and agree either a compromise, or to agree to disagree.
Arguing gets us nowhere, but our natural instincts are determined to tell us otherwise. Together, let’s try and change that, yeah?